Mirrors & Bathhouses
Last February, I went to my first bathhouse in Sapporo, Japan. There was a bathhouse in the hotel that my partner and I stayed at, so every night, we visited the bathhouse.
A bath house is a communal space, often indoors with multiple heated baths (pools), some with cold baths and saunas. Most bathhouses require full nudity, so there are dressing rooms to get undressed before entering. There are also separate bathhouses for men and women.
My Experience
When I first entered the dressing room, I was shocked to see so many naked women. Some had come out of the bath next door, some were blow drying their hair and some were getting ready to bathe.
I had so many questions. When exactly do I get naked? Where do I shower before entering the bath? What do I do with my towel?
I sparked a conversation with an elderly woman who had just come from the bath. I pointed at my towel seeking for advice. She chuckled and said something in Japanese. Although I don’t understand Japanese, I sensed that she was telling me to just get naked and go next door.
As I finally entered the pool room, the temperature raised to over 35 degrees. On the left were two rectangle baths radiating with steam. I could see the top halves of women soaking in the baths and lounging alongside its parameters.
On the right, were about 16 semi open basins divided by small walls where more women were washing themselves. It is a rule to wash yourself before entering the baths, so I made my way to one of the basins. Each basin had a mirror on the front facing wall, a stool, washing nozzle and some hair and body lotions.
After figuring out what everything was, I began to wash myself and notice the mirror in front of me. In daily life, there is no mirror when you shower. I also avoided mirrors in general.
As a woman, somewhere along the way, we have been fed with distorted images, stories and lies about how our bodies should look.
Somewhere along the way, we’ve become the perfect hosts to feeding disempowering thoughts about our bodies and who we are.
Somewhere along the way, we’ve been blinded from seeing our own innate beauty.
With nowhere else to look but at the mirror, I decided to look at myself through the eyes of love.
As I began to wash myself and relax, I started to appreciate my wet face, my full belly, and my toned and untoned limbs. I tuned into my five senses and enjoyed the benefits of the water and steam.
No matter how much my body did not match up to the expectations of my conditioned mind, I could not deny the beauty that I could always find in a woman’s natural form.
After washing myself, I made my way to one of the baths. As I settled in, I began to notice how varied each woman’s bodies were. There were women of different ages with different figures, postures and breast sizes. I noticed how the water and steam amplified the beauty in each woman; the way they washed themselves and the way they lounged in and out of the pools.
I was not the only one looking. We were all subtly observing each other, and instead of judgement, curiosity predominated the room.
Amongst all our differences, it seemed like we were all connected by an invisible thread, and that we were very much the same.
After an hour or so, I came out of the bath house with a blushing face, a well circulated body and warm feet. I felt more connected to my body and a little closer to the women around me.
Every night in Sapporo, my partner and I would return from the bath house, followed by a peaceful night's sleep.
